"Civil Unions" - Not All They're Cracked Up To Be

Sometime in the last couple of weeks, I posted about New Jersey's problems with enforcing its Civil Union Law. At that time I didn't know many details; just that it was happening with increasing frequency.

I received this email from Garden State Equality just a few minutes ago. It explains some of the reasons why the New Jersey Civil Union Act isn't working while the Massachusetts marriage law evidently is.

I'm still waiting for God to come down and strike Massachusetts but it hasn't happened yet.

If you didn't see yesterday's Sunday Star-Ledger investigation revealing how civil unions in New Jersey are failing to provide equality, here it is, below.

The article describes how New Jersey's civil unions law is falling way short of providing equality to same-sex couples -- specifically how one firm, UPS, is providing benefits to married same-sex couples in Massachusetts but not to civil-unioned couples in New Jersey.

Garden State Equality has other cases like this. An investigation in last week's Washington Post reported how employers in Massachusetts, where there is real marriage equality, are not invoking a federal law loophole, whereas employers in New Jersey are.

Same-sex couples in Massachusetts are consistently getting equality. Same-sex couples in New Jersey are not. The word "marriage" is making all the persuasive difference in the world. That's why Garden State Equality is fighting day and night, with all our blood, sweat and tears, to bring marriage equality to New Jersey by the end of next year.

To help us win marriage equality in New Jersey, you may donate to Garden State Equality online at www.GardenStateEquality.org. Thanks so much.
Star-Ledger, Sunday, July 8, 2007
In denying benefits, firm says civil union not marriage's equal

By Robert Schwaneberg

A company that provides health care coverage to married gay couples in Massachusetts has denied the same benefits to a couple who entered a civil union in New Jersey.

United Parcel Service's decision to deny coverage to a Toms River couple boils down to a single word: New Jersey law does not call them "spouses."

"We were supposed to be treated equally. We should be treated equally," said Heather Aurand, who was denied health care coverage by UPS, which employs Aurand's civil union partner, Gabriael "Nickie" Brazier.

In its letter denying coverage, UPS said it does provide health benefits to its employees' spouses, including spouses of the same sex who are married in Massachusetts. But it said New Jersey's decision to recognize same-sex relationships as civil unions rather than marriages tied its hands.

Gay rights activists called it the starkest proof to date that New Jersey's civil union law has failed to deliver on its promise to provide all the benefits of marriage, but by a different name.

"The Legislature said: You folks aren't worthy of marriage. That has an impact," said David Buckel, a lawyer with the gay rights organization Lambda Legal. "If the New Jersey Legislature would just take back the invitation to discriminate, UPS would do the right thing."

"This is a problem the Legislature created," added Steven Goldstein, chairman of the gay rights group Garden State Equality. "Civil unions are never in our lifetime going to be respected by employers like marriage."

Garden State Equality has received 176 complaints from couples who said their civil unions were not honored, Goldstein said, adding that it has created great disillusionment within the gay community.

In its letter, UPS said the New Jersey Legislature, in enacting the state's civil union law, "did not go as far as Massachusetts and afford same-sex couples the ability to marry. Had the New Jersey Legislature done that, you could have added Ms. Aurand as a spouse under the plan."

The letter concluded that "New Jersey law does not treat civil unions the same as marriages."

"I'm shocked," said Assemblyman Wilfredo Caraballo (D-Essex), who sponsored the civil union law. "We made it clear through the language and the intent that when it came to issues like this, we fully expected civil-unioned couples would be covered."

Tom Prol, a trustee of the New Jersey State Bar Association, said UPS's position was "a misinterpretation, clearly, of the civil union law." He noted that law states: "Civil union couples shall have all of the same benefits . . . as are granted to spouses in a marriage."

But benefit plans offered by many employers, including UPS, are governed by federal law, which recognizes only the union of a man and a woman as a marriage. Those companies are allowed, although not required, to deny benefits to partners in other relationships.

In its letter, UPS said the health plan it negotiated for its workers provides benefits only to "a spouse as defined under applicable state law." It added that the company "cannot unilaterally change plan provisions outside of the collective-bargaining process." A message left at UPS headquarters in Atlanta seeking further comment from the company was not returned.

Aurand and Brazier said they were hopeful when Gov. Jon Corzine, while signing the civil union law in December, declared: "Through our actions today, we will provide equal rights for same-sex couples."

"That's what we believed," said Brazier, 37, a driver for UPS for six years. She and Aurand, 36, met seven years ago in Pennsylvania and bought their house in Toms River in 2001.

"We plan on staying together the rest of our lives," said Aurand, who became a stay-at-home mom after their son Zachary was born in 2004. They formed their civil union on Feb. 21, days after the new law took effect and the week before the birth of their twins, Joshua and Riley.

Brazier, who knew UPS provided health benefits to same-sex spouses in Massachusetts, expected it would extend them to Aurand. But the company said no.

"It was devastating. We were for certain we would get coverage," Aurand said. "Financially it puts a burden on us. We have to pay a couple of hundred dollars a month that we could be using for other things."

Other same-sex couples have encountered the same problem because of the conflict between state law and the federal Defense Of Marriage Act, which does not recognize same-sex unions.

Buckel said the case of Brazier and Aurand is a new wrinkle, as they were turned down not because they are of the same sex, but because of the label New Jersey gave to their relationship.

"It's probably going to be happening more and more," Buckel said.

Already, Tom Walton of East Brunswick, a driver for UPS for 14 years, said he was verbally rejected when he sought health coverage for his civil union partner, Mermon Davis. He said he has not gotten a formal explanation.

"It's upsetting," Walton said. "We were told this law was going to give us the same benefits as everybody else, even though they weren't calling it marriage. It just goes to show when something is separate, it's never equal."

Walton, 42, said he and Davis, 44, have been together 15 years and had their civil union ceremony over the Memorial Day weekend.

Buckel said the next step will be "to try to persuade UPS to change its mind," adding that Lambda Legal also will be talking to lawmakers about changing the law to allow same sex couples to marry.

Goldstein added, "We've heard from many legislators that this is something they want to deal with in 2008."

As for the civil union law, he said, "They know it's a disaster. In the real world, civil unions are to marriage what artificial sweetener is to sugar. It's not the same thing and it leaves a bad aftertaste."

COMMENTS:

ThomasLB said...

This comment is off topic (so you can delete if after you read it and won't hurt my feelings), but I just noticed under Settings / Formatting, at the very bottom of the page, there is an option called "Enable Float Alignment." It says to uncheck the box if you're having formatting problems.

Have you tried that yet?

Monday, July 09, 2007 6:29:00 AM

ThomasLB said...

I knew two guys who shared an apartment. One was mentally handicapped, one was physically handicapped. They looked after each other and cared for each other. They weren't gay, they were close like brothers.

One of them died. His body was stored for a year at the county morgue, then buried in a pauper's grave. Because they were not related, his friend was not allowed to claim the body and give him a funeral and a headstone.

I wish there was a way for anybody that wanted to call themselves a family to legally accept responsibility for each other.

When going "by the book" hurts people, that damn book needs to be thrown out!

Before I boycott UPS, I'm going to write a polite letter asking them to revisit their policy. (That's really just a formality, like playing the national anthem before a baseball game.)

Monday, July 09, 2007 6:50:00 AM

Worried said...

ThomasLB; thank you for the tip re: our blog problems. I do have "no" checked and have ever since I started blogging. Should I check "yes"? I have no idea what to do with the code printed there.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 12:27:00 AM

Granny said...

WA, I'll check it on granny and see if it's checked yes or no (providing I can find it).

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 12:34:00 AM

AM

ThomasLB said...

It should be on "No" if you're having formatting problems, and since you already have it on "No," that wasn't the problem. Rats- I wish it really was that simple.

Did you get the same email from UPS that I did? Here is the text of it below- they are blaming everything on the Teamster's Union:


-- -- -- -- -- --
I saw your post. Hopefully, you'll be openminded to hear the UPS viewpoint and reconsider your opinion about UPS.

As a matter of corporate policy, UPS currently offers same sex benefits to all non-union employees -- management as well as administrative workers. This includes all such employees in New Jersey, even though the state has failed to recognize gay partners as married spouses. Beyond health care, UPS also offers benefits such as medical leave, pension rights, funeral leave, relocation and transfer benefits. We recently added same-sex benefits as part of a new contract with UPS pilots too.

UPS doesn't legally have the right to give same sex benefits to Ms. Brazier who is cited in this situation because she is part of the Teamsters and any changes to benefits have to be done as part of the collective bargain process.

The contact expires in 2008. Absent a law that specifically categorizes same sex partners as married spouses such as in Mass., UPS cannot unilaterally change a union contract to offer same sex benefits. We have already brought up this issue to the Teamsters for consideration.

The situation regarding Ms. Brazier and her partner is just as disappointing to UPS as it is to them. But for unionized employees, we can only address the issue through the union at contract renewal time.

Lynnette
UPS PR

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 11:16:00 AM

ThomasLB said...

I have a little post up over at my website about this. LINK

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 12:12:00 PM

Christian Taliban - Part II

From Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot - in their post Paul Hill Days

George L. Wilson of Children Need Heroes and Drew Heiss of Street Preach are planning to honor Paul Hill in a series of events called "Paul Hill Days" in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, July 26th - 29th -- "to honor him as God's man and our hero."

Who was Paul Hill and why is he being "honored"?

From Wikipedia:

Paul Jennings Hill was an anti-abortion activist and a terrorist connected to the Army of God, who was convicted of the murders of physician John Britton and his clinic escort, James Barrett, outside a Pensacola, Florida abortion clinic on July 29, 1994.

Hill was executed for his crime, thus turning him into a Christian martyr. Yeah, right.

And again from WTF:

Paul Hill, Shelly Shannon, James Kopp and Eric Rudolph are all Christian terrorists. There is no difference between them and the Islamic terrorists who strap on suicide bombs to kill "unbelievers" in the Middle East to enforce Burkhas on their women.

All these terrorists have assumed the right to kill people they cannot convince to accept their beliefs, and they do it in the name of an unreasoning God that only they hear telling them to kill. All involve a few active terrorists supported by a much larger group of active supporters of terrorism, and the larger groups recruit and encourage other killers to do their bidding by calling them "heroes."

These are the "heroes" the current Administration and Supreme Court support. By their action (or their inaction), they create a climate in which these homegrown terrorists flourish. With our own silence, we do the same.

Their entire post is well worth reading.

What about James Dobson and his ranting? Watch this short video and then contact your Senators. Ask them to vote for HR1592, the Matthew Shepard (Hate Crimes) bill. It passed the House but we're being outnumbered by a telephone and mail campaign orchestrated by Dobson and his buddies.

(Thanks to Huffington Post among the several other newsblogs posting the video)

According to "Thomas", the bill has been referred to the Senate Judiciary Committee. Take a look at the Republican side. The fundamentalist names should jump out at you.



Patrick J. Leahy
CHAIRMAN, D-VERMONT

Edward M. Kennedy
D-MASSACHUSETTS

Joseph R. Biden, Jr.
D-DELAWARE

Herb Kohl
D-WISCONSIN

Dianne Feinstein
D-CALIFORNIA

Russell D. Feingold
D-WISCONSIN

Charles E. Schumer
D-NEW YORK

Richard J. Durbin
D-ILLINOIS

Benjamin L. Cardin
D-MARYLAND

Sheldon Whitehouse
D-RHODE ISLAND

Arlen Specter
RANKING MEMBER, R-PENNSYLVANIA

Orrin G. Hatch
R-UTAH

Charles E. Grassley
R-IOWA

Jon Kyl
R-ARIZONA

Jeff Sessions
R-ALABAMA

Lindsey Graham
R-SOUTH CAROLINA

John Cornyn
R-TEXAS

Sam Brownback
R-KANSAS

Tom Coburn
R-OKLAHOMA

(Yes I know I posted about HR 1592 before - this is an update and reminder.)

We can fight this "American Taliban" but we won't do it if all we do is talk to each other.

COMMENTS:

Worried said...

Fundies rally their "troops" (followers- millions of them) to inundate Congress with emails and letters. Bloggers and fellow citizens MUST do the same in order to attain a majority of anti-theocracy/pro-separation of church and state potential voters.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007 11:58:00 PM

HR 1592 - One More Time

Great post, WA!!

Here's what that loving Christian, Donald Wildmon, has to say. I've had it for a few days but was reluctant to post the contents of the letter and blow my cover.

However, he suggested I inform my friends so that's what I'm doing. It may be the last mail I ever receive from him.

I'll have to check on the California lawsuit he mentioned. They usually twist the facts but I'll try to make sure. It applies only to government workers evidently in any event.

The administration denies that Pace's opinions were the actual cause of his firings.

June 14, 2007

Please help us get this information into the hands of as many people as possible by forwarding it to your entire email list of family and friends.

A bill in Congress makes it a crime for pastors and churches to speak against homosexuality

Message to pastors and other Christians: Just keep your mouth shut

Dear ann,

If pastors and other Christians don’t aggressively oppose a bill now in Congress, in the near future they will be subject to huge fines and prison terms if they say anything negative about homosexuality.

The proposed law would make it a crime to preach on Romans Chapter 1 or I Corinthians Chapter 6. Or even to discuss them in a Sunday School class. If churches and individuals want to keep the government from telling them what they can and cannot preach and teach about homosexuality, they better get involved now!

House bill H.R. 1592 and Senate bill S. 1105 would make negative statements concerning homosexuality, such as calling the practice of homosexuality a sin from the pulpit, a “hate crime” punishable by law. This dangerous legislation would take away your freedom of speech and your freedom of religion. Consider what has already happened:

• A California lawsuit which is headed to the U.S. Supreme Court would make the use of the words “natural family,” “marriage” and “union of a man and a woman” a “hate speech” crime in government workplaces. The 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals has already ruled in favor of the plaintiffs!
  
  
• CNN and The Washington Post both reported that General Peter Pace, former chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, was fired because he publicly expressed moral opposition to homosexual behavior.

For the Alliance Defense Fund’s summary of this bill, click here.

Take Action

We are looking for one million Americans willing to take a stand and not allow a small group of homosexual activists to take away our freedoms. Can we count on you? Click on the link below to sign our Petition to Congress in Defense of Religious Freedom. Please forward this to others, especially your pastor, and ask them to get involved in protecting our freedoms of speech and religion. This threat to our religious freedoms is real! ====================== And, one more time, here is the actual language of HR 1592 Nothing in this Act, or the amendments made by this Act, shall be construed to prohibit any expressive conduct protected from legal prohibition by, or any activities protected by the free speech or free exercise clauses of, the First Amendment to the Constitution.

COMMENTS:

David Cho said...
I have a question about this.Isn't there a federal provision already in place for hate crimes committed against people because of their race and religion already?And this new legislation adds to the existing law the homosexuality element to this. Is my understanding correct?
Sunday, June 17, 2007 2:51:00 PM
Worried said...
Heh! Heh! Granny, I suppose both of us have blown our cover. I. too, subscribe to fundie newsletters and literature to keep abreast of what they are up to in order to "know thine enemy". I do not view fellow Christians as my enemy by any means, even if our beliefs differ somewhat, but I object quite strenuously to some of the beliefs, practises and goals of the fundies. I also object to our president and elected representatives allowing the fundies (or any religious group) to gain too much power in the halls of government.
Sunday, June 17, 2007 5:06:00 PM

[WA: David, see post above this for a response to your question]

And More on the Fundies - HR 1592

They're opposed (no surprises there) to hate crime legislation, which includes prosecution for violent acts based on gender identity bias., currently making its ponderous way through Congress.

Isn't "thou shalt not bear false witness" one of the Commandments? Yep, thought so. It doesn't seem to slow the religious extremists down.

They're claiming, in unison, that passage of the bill will be the death of free speech in this country and that pastors will be unable to preach according to their beliefs.

Nothing could be further from the truth. The operative words are "bodily injury" As in "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". (Not completely true of course, words can hurt, but they are not the subject matter of this bill).

Here is the report from Tom Paine today.

Here is the description and text of Senator Kennedy's Bill itself.

Below are three excerpts from H.R. 1592: Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act of 2007.

`(1) OFFENSES INVOLVING ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED RACE, COLOR, RELIGION, OR NATIONAL ORIGIN- Whoever, whether or not acting under color of law, willfully causes bodily injury to any person or, through the use of fire, a firearm, or an explosive or incendiary device, attempts to cause bodily injury to any person, because of the actual or perceived race, color, religion, or national origin of any person--

`(2) OFFENSES INVOLVING ACTUAL OR PERCEIVED RELIGION, NATIONAL ORIGIN, GENDER, SEXUAL ORIENTATION, GENDER IDENTITY, OR DISABILITY-

`(A) IN GENERAL- Whoever, whether or not acting under color of law, in any circumstance described in subparagraph (B), willfully causes bodily injury to any person or, through the use of fire, a firearm, or an explosive or incendiary device, attempts to cause bodily injury to any person, because of the actual or perceived religion, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity or disability of any person--

SEC. 8. RULE OF CONSTRUCTION.

Nothing in this Act, or the amendments made by this Act, shall be construed to prohibit any expressive conduct protected from legal prohibition by, or any activities protected by the free speech or free exercise clauses of, the First Amendment to the Constitution.

That leaves me with two possible explanations for the fundies' approach.

1. Illiteracy

2. Prevarication

Our Senators and Representatives may need our support since I imagine the extremists will swarm all over them.

In related news, did you know those evil lesbians will be responsible if one of our cities is devastated by an "Act of God"? The Reverend John McArthur of Grace Community Church says so and James Dobson of Focus on the Family agrees.

Here's a portion of the Media Matters report:

On the June 4 edition of his Focus on the Family radio show, Focus on the Family founder and chairman James C. Dobson broadcast a sermon by John MacArthur, pastor of Grace Community Church in Sun Valley, California, titled "A Nation Abandoned by God." In the sermon, MacArthur said America had forsaken God and engendered the "wrath of abandonment" as a result. MacArthur declared: "You know a society has been abandoned by God when it celebrates lesbian sex." MacArthur further argued that as a result of America's abandonment, the destruction of a major U.S. city "could happen" and that "God would be just in any calamity he brought upon us."

The good reverend's diatribe was included in a sermon presented on the National Day of Prayer.

No wonder these Taliban imitators are so concerned about keeping their freedom of speech.

Not to worry, it's protected, thanks to the hard work of several of the organizations they most despise.

Afterthought: The man goes on to rail against the number of pornographic websites on the net. Don't get me wrong, I'm no fan of pornography (to each their own as long as children aren't involved), but take a look back at my post of a few days ago for true pornography masquerading as religious belief.

Perhaps this preacher should read his own Bible a little more often.

Luke 6:42 and again in Matthew 7:5 (from the Beatitudes):

KJV: Either how canst thou say to thy brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when thou thyself beholdest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother's eye.

COMMENTS:

Worried said...
After I fussed last night about being unable to access the comments page, Blogger suddenly allowed it. I haven't tried the add image box. Good post, Granny. people need to know how dangerous these fundies are.
Thursday, June 07, 2007 10:18:00 PM

Granny said...
Glad you could see the comments.I don't want to run the fundie idiocy into the ground but sometimes it's impossible to resist.We need to take them very seriously, no matter how ridiculous they sound.
Thursday, June 07, 2007 10:46:00 PM
Nvisiblewmn said...
Wow, good one there about "bearing false witness...."
Friday, June 08, 2007 7:53:00 AM
ThomasLB said...
They don't seem to understand that a hate crime is fundamentally different than a regular crime.If I don't like a guy so I punch him in the nose, the only guy affected is the individual I punched.If I hate gay people, and scour the neighborhood looking for a gay guy to pummel, that affects far more than the individual- that terrorizes the whole community.Maybe that's the way we need to approach it. Don't tell anybody we're protecting gay people, tell them it's an anti-terrorism bill.
Friday, June 08, 2007 11:49:00 AM
Worried:
I usually try to understand another person's viewpoint even when I thoroughly disagree with him. For the life of me, I simply cannot get any understanding of why the fundies are so obsessed with other people's sex lives. As long as private intimacy is between consenting adults, who cares ?! Of all the fascinating facets of humans that interest me, their sexuality or sex lives is not even on the list. I think the fundies need some sessions with a good psychotherapist.

National Blogging for LGBT Families Day

I don't know if the "button" at the top of this post will show up or not. I can't see it but that doesn't mean it's not there. For some reason, I've been having problems viewing pictures and images.

Dana at Mombian reminds us that June 1st is Blogging for LGBT Families day and has asked us for posts. I'll be happy to.

This is a link to a post I wrote last February about LGBT students and the dangers they face in the schools. Dana assured me recycling was allowed.

I'm sure you know by now I'm the mom of a gay son and a charter member of our local PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians & Gays) group. I've marched in the San Francisco gay pride parade with my son and been as active as my time and energy permits in fighting for equal rights for all our citizens.

Our local PFLAG group in this small, conservative city, has marched, banner flying proudly, in our local parades and we've manned booths at every available opportunity. People are becoming accustomed to seeing us. They have even cheered or, at worst, been polite.

I've spent the last hour searching through the internet looking for statistics on LGBT families. Instead, I discovered Gay Family Support written by a woman named Debbie, not unlike me, with one gay and one bisexual son. She tells her own story and provides links which answer questions for parents.

It's written in conversational language, accurate and helpful.

My oldest great-granddaughter, Elcie, graduated from the 8th grade this evening. We're all immensely proud of course. You can read all about it over on "granny".

I posted pictures, one of which is a photo of Elcie's two younger sisters, Rebecca and Rochelle, with me and their Uncle Tim. Take a look and see if you think our multi-racial, multi-gender, multi-generational family poses a threat to anyone. Don't we look pretty much like everyone else?

I've made several friends in the blogging community who in one way or another are LGBT families. Lion Mom and her partner (now married courtesy of Canada) have adopted several children. Yondalla fosters gay teens. Foster Abba and Foster Eema are lesbian foster parents. Bacchus and his partner have adopted a little boy. Trey and his partner have adopted a little girl. And Mombian of course. Her blog name speaks for itself. Each of their sites has links to other parenting blogs. i wish I had time to read them all.

None of them are involved in undermining society. They're far too busy raising their families.

Perhaps someday we can stop attaching labels to families. We're no different from anyone else.
COMMENTS:

Kvatch said...
PFLAG always makes a big appearance at the Pride Day Parade here, and...next to the guys who populate the Department of Public Works float, always seem to be the happiest group on the parade route.
Friday, June 01, 2007 1:33:00 PM
Jo said...
Your family looks just like mine. Filled with love. Hugs to you and yours!
Friday, June 01, 2007 1:46:00 PM
betmo said...
i am sorry i missed out.
Friday, June 01, 2007 4:47:00 PM

Don't Ask, Don't Tell

I've been following the Peter Pace story much of the day watching him try to backtrack on his homophobic comments.

He's from New Jersey so here's what Garden State Equality had to say.

As you may have read in today's news, General Peter Pace, chairman of the joint chiefs of staff, has endorsed the U.S. military's policy of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." Pace, who grew up in New Jersey, says: "homosexual acts between two individuals are immoral... and I do not believe the United States is well served by a policy that says it is okay to be immoral in any way."

Response from Garden State Equality:

First the general is hardly in a position to judge others. As a leader of the war in Iraq, General Pace has shown as much savvy in leading the military as Alfred E. Neuman would have in explaining the theory of relativity. Of course General Pace believes in "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." He's been key to the Administration's edict, "Don't ask about the war, and don't tell the American people how badly it's going."

Secondly, how ironic for man whose last name is Pace that the general hasn't kept up with the pace of progress. His views qualify him to run a war in the Gunsmoke era of 1955 rather than in a military theatre in 2007.

Thirdly, it's too bad that growing up in New Jersey didn't rub off on General Pace. Where New Jersey is the state that doesn't hate, General Pace somehow got stuck in a personal state of hate.

I started writing this yesterday and had some other links to add. Blogger wouldn't cooperate so I'm leaving it as is.

Before blogger goes nuts again, Heidi (aka VirusHead) has an excellent post up today. Long, but well worth reading. I'm showing it here even though it's unrelated except indirectly to gays in military and bigotry. I'm afraid if I don't do it now, I may not be able to connect with blogger again.

Later - much later.

I've been trying all day to post this. Finally recopied it to a new page and trying again.

It's now after 7:00 p.m. PDT and 27 hours have elapsed since I began this post.

Citizen Rights for ALL

http://www.freedomtomarry.org/node.asp?id=3605

It is too late to get in on the "week" but it is never too late to get involved. Involvement in this movement can be 365 days a year, not just one week. ALL Americans should have the same basic rights.

The Religious Right is silly to claim that gay marriage undermines and threatens the sanctity of marriage. I asked a certain Christian person who swallowed the brainwashing of the CR/RR just how a gay pair marrying threatened or undermined the sanctity of her very stable and loving marriage. She gaped at me. Like so many of the faithful, she had never exercised any reasoning thought about the CR/RR rhetoric, just accepted it as holy truth. HOGWASH!

10th Annual Freedom to Marry Week 10 years of work. 10 years of change. 10 years closer to equality. Now all we need is you. Read more...

See Granny's posts below re: gay rights, gay children/foster parents

Bait and Switch

Does it come as any surprise that politicians lie? When the religious right was campaigning for the anti-gay marriage law last year, they assured the voters that it wouldn't affect any protections currently in place for all domestic partners.

They have changed their tune as most of us knew they would.

I live in California which hasn't yet approved gay civil unions or marriage but has approved domestic partners. They don't receive many of the protections which automatically come with marriage but it's a start.

We've been successful so far in beating back the challenges here.

Since anything that affects my son also affects me, I'm quite active in the struggle for gay rights. I would have been in any event but for me it's personal.

Gay adoption/foster care is legal here. I've probably said this before but if I don't make it to see the girls grown (youngest now 11), I'd like their Uncle Tim to take over. If the religious right gets their way, that won't happen. Even if he does, any legal rights he would have in California might not carry over to another state. I don't understand why "full faith and credit" doesn't apply but evidently it doesn't. It isn't fair and it isn't right.

I visit several blogs written by GLBT adoptive and foster parents. Daddy, Papa & Me writes about his family life in San Francisco with their beautiful adopted daughter. He also writes about gay rights and spells out the Michigan outrage better than I ever could. It's personal to him as well as to me.

I borrowed the title of this post from him. Bait and switch says it all.

What If the Tables Were Turned?

My friend, Yondalla, (with a lot of help from her family) fosters gay teenage boys. She is loving, compassionate, and brilliant. She's also honest about the joys, the sorrows, successes, failures, and sometimes the frustrations of working within the "system". In her "spare" time, she's a University teacher.

She and I "met" when she noticed the PFLAG link on granny and we've become close online friends. For any who may not know, that's Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (since expanded to include transgender and bisexual. My two sons and I helped start the chapter here. One is gay, the other isn't but they've always supported each other.

Her post today talks about singling out and stereotyping. It's a topic we come back to often in our meetings.

Thanks, Yondalla.